I am not always a fun parent.
Anyone who knows me might not be too surprised to hear this. I am fun because I can think of activities to go out and do, and I try to make sure we have fun stuff in the house. But when it comes to getting down and playing, I'm not too fun. I just don't get it. I'm not good at playacting, I'm not good at roughhousing, and too much noise makes me cranky. I do it, but I don't last very long. I like to read, and am good at reading with the kids. I'm also fun when I drink, but I don't do that with the kids (although they may like me better if I did).
I read about a book called Playful Parentingand thought "this is the book for me." It's all about how play can be therapeutic, and bring parents and kids closer together. I get that in theory, which is why I bought the book. But when it comes down to doing it, I'm just not that great.
I'm about 10 pages in now, and already get what the author is saying. It makes so much sense. Part of the problem he identifies is that adults are always thinking of something else to do: laundry, work, cooking. That is totally me. Although the author doesn't phrase it as such, part of getting into play is about being present. So instead of trying to sneak in some extra work once I picked them up, putting away laundry, we headed outside with chalk, bubbles, and new super hero dolls.
What really helped is that Oli came up with a new game. Instead of the dolls being the bad guys, he was the bad guy beating up the dolls. And, instead of the guys hitting each other, they had to hit him. So, I was the guys, and basically got to bean Oli with the stuffies. It t was sort of like a pillow fight, but with superhero dolls. It feels kind of wrong that I enjoyed it so much, since it was really me hitting him with the stuffed animals. He made very funny voices. Sometimes, Oli seems out of touch with what is going on. But sometimes, he is so aware and creative and funny that it cracks me up.
We made it for about 40 minutes, and then I really did have to come in to cook dinner. And soon enough, Oli's friends came over to play. Was I relieved? Yes. I knew he was having fun, engaging in play, and I could cook dinner and clean up the dishes in the sink . Did I have fun playing? Yes.
